It's 9:51 on a Saturday morning I'm on hour 55 or so of being stuck in a hospital bed. Life is so crazy and unexpected and can be so painful.
My Crohn's disease is in complete remission. Thanks to the best nutrition on the planet, I have enjoyed several years now of remission, health, healing, and LIVING LIFE.
However, scar tissue in my intestinal tract, from the many years that I was so ill, has reared it's ugly head once again and caused a bowel obstruction. It began Wednesday afternoon. Initially, I thought it was just something that I ate. However, 12 hours later it was so excruciating that I could barely breathe and was on the bathroom floor, rocking back & forth, writhing & sobbing in pain and distress.
I was trying to deny what was happening. Maybe it was one of the stomach bugs going around. However, deep down, I knew exactly what I was feeling and experiencing.
And it terrified me.
I so badly want to be PAST all of this. I'm healthy now, the Crohn's is in remission, I have the best nutrition in the world and live a full and vibrant life. So in my mind, this should not be happening.
Sadly, years and years of illness cannot be completely erased. I spent years so severely ill. (Additionally, several weeks ago I had an oral surgery that has caused many complications and side effects and meds that negatively affect my gut health and most likely triggered this.)
Looking back, it's still painful to recall those weeks, months, and years.
But amidst the pain, I see God's faithfulness. And that faithfulness is the same today because my God does not change.
And as I sit here on this Saturday morning, bored and exhausted and sick of Netflix, I rejoice in His goodness to me.
I have the best husband in the world who exemplifies what true love is and it shines bright for the world to see, always in health and especially in sickness. He stayed up with me all night the first night, held me, prayed over me, cared for me, loved me. And he is by my bedside every moment that he possibly can be.
I have a mom who comes and stays with me so that I have someone here even when my hubby needs to be at work and takes the best notes of what the doctors and nurses say and what meds I had when and how i'm doing.
I have family that visits me and friends that text and pray.
And I have Jesus. He is enough.
My Crohn's disease is in complete remission. Thanks to the best nutrition on the planet, I have enjoyed several years now of remission, health, healing, and LIVING LIFE.
However, scar tissue in my intestinal tract, from the many years that I was so ill, has reared it's ugly head once again and caused a bowel obstruction. It began Wednesday afternoon. Initially, I thought it was just something that I ate. However, 12 hours later it was so excruciating that I could barely breathe and was on the bathroom floor, rocking back & forth, writhing & sobbing in pain and distress.
I was trying to deny what was happening. Maybe it was one of the stomach bugs going around. However, deep down, I knew exactly what I was feeling and experiencing.
And it terrified me.
I so badly want to be PAST all of this. I'm healthy now, the Crohn's is in remission, I have the best nutrition in the world and live a full and vibrant life. So in my mind, this should not be happening.
Sadly, years and years of illness cannot be completely erased. I spent years so severely ill. (Additionally, several weeks ago I had an oral surgery that has caused many complications and side effects and meds that negatively affect my gut health and most likely triggered this.)
Looking back, it's still painful to recall those weeks, months, and years.
But amidst the pain, I see God's faithfulness. And that faithfulness is the same today because my God does not change.
And as I sit here on this Saturday morning, bored and exhausted and sick of Netflix, I rejoice in His goodness to me.
I have the best husband in the world who exemplifies what true love is and it shines bright for the world to see, always in health and especially in sickness. He stayed up with me all night the first night, held me, prayed over me, cared for me, loved me. And he is by my bedside every moment that he possibly can be.
I have a mom who comes and stays with me so that I have someone here even when my hubby needs to be at work and takes the best notes of what the doctors and nurses say and what meds I had when and how i'm doing.
I have family that visits me and friends that text and pray.
And I have Jesus. He is enough.