the life of (n)joy
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Grandpa

12/20/2014

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Grandpa went home to be with Jesus on Thursday, November 20th. God blessed us with a wonderful  time of celebrating his life and legacy during the week of Thanksgiving. Memories were made that will last a lifetime. Below are some words I scribbled about forty-eight hours before he passed.
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Tuesday, November 18, 2014 12:30PM

I'm sitting here on a Tuesday afternoon, taking a lunch break. I grabbed Culvers' deal of the day, which means I'm chowing down a cheddar butterburger and fries and a Dr. Pepper. Far from my normal healthy lunch but sometimes life happens and you're up late weeping the night before and don't get out of bed in time to pack a lunch.

As I sit here typing, my grandfather is slowly taking his final breaths in his earthly body. It rips my heart out to not be able to be there with him and my grandma. These are the times I want to curse all the hundreds of miles between us. All I can do is pray until I don't know what to pray anymore.

Even as the tears flow and my heart aches, there is such tremendous joy and peace we all have. Amidst our mourning, our hearts rejoice for Grandpa's sake. His pain, his suffering, his confusion: it's almost over. OVER! FOREVER! Jesus is waiting to welcome him home with arms wide open. Soon he will hear, "Well done, good and faithful servant." He will have no more tears.

This amazing man of God is finishing his race and he is finishing it well. The legacy he leaves behind for his children and grandchildren and great grandchildren is incredible. He has wholeheartedly followed his Savior and been an example to each of us.

Grandpa loved to laugh. He loved to crack jokes. He loved to poke fun. The mischievous sparkle in his eye is one of my favorite memories (maybe that's where I got my own mischievous look from?).  His whole life, he has just been there -- for all of us. He and Grandma would drive hours and hours, just to be at a recital or movie shoot or graduation or some other special event in the lives of their children or grandchildren. It didn't matter how inconvenient, how many hours on the road, how many gallons of gas: they were there. 

I was telling my sister-in-law last night...one of my most vivid and happy memories of him is so simple it seems silly. But it stands out so brightly in my mind. I was a teenager and he and Grandma were leaving our house in their motorhome. He had the window down and was smiling from ear to ear and waving. He looked so happy. I ran down and gave him one last peck on the cheek before they pulled out of the driveway. It's a moment I'll cherish for years and years to come. 

The gratitude to our God for the memories and heritage He gave us through my grandpa is ginormous. We are blessed beyond measure. Even as we weep right now, we know joy is coming in the morning: for Grandpa and for us. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that our God is walking him through this valley of the shadow of death.

And I am just so incredibly thankful amidst my tears. 
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Distracted

12/14/2014

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It's a Sunday morning and I'm sitting on the couch in my brother's little Chicago apartment. It's been a slow and fairly quiet morning (as quiet as having five people smashed into a teeny tiny apartment can be), after an afternoon and evening of walking downtown yesterday. I've had time to read blog posts and devotionals and Scripture and watch funny videos and scroll Facebook and play Words with Friends. Chill would describe this morning quite well. Chill may or may not have been my goal, even as I planned this spontaneous last minute trip into the Windy City. 
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Part of my morning browsing included stumbling across this article. And the conviction I've been experiencing recently became even stronger. (Please take a couple minutes to go read the article; it is so good.)

I am distracted; distracted by the busyness of life; distracted by the chaos; distracted by the pain and trials; distracted by my iPhone; distracted by endless commitments; distracted by a hundredgood things. 

But they are distracting from the best thing; the best One. 

In many ways I am learning more and growing more as a Christian than ever before, as God hastaken yanked me out of my comfort zone and given me renewed passion to know more about Him and His Word and to serve and disciple others in His name.

But.

But amidst the even fuller schedule that has resulted from that, I've been distracted from spending quiet moments with Him and only Him and His Word. And without those moments, my effectiveness for Him and for His Gospel diminishes into the ground at an incredibly rapid rate. 

If my Savior Himself needed to separate Himself from the people and the ministry to spend time in solitude with His Father, how can I for a moment think I can get by fine without it? (Matthew 14:23) (Mark 1:35)

It comes down to pride, lack of discipline, and too much busyness.

And just being distracted.

Distracted from the most important thing; the most important One.

Friday night I came across sermon notes from several weeks ago. A note I had jotted down from what the pastor had shared went something like this: busyness is the greatest distraction from a vibrant prayer life. (I totally botched it but that's the gist of what he said.)

I don't want to live a distracted life, even if most of those distractions are good. I want to live a life solely focused on Jesus Christ Himself, His Word, and my personal relationship with Him. The rest of life and ministry and relationships must flow from that foundation alone.
But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. 
(Matthew 6:33)
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